| Show Some
Respect!
Has anyone else noticed the lack of respect
our young people have in our society today? Not all young people,
but an increasingly high number. I’ve noticed it more with
the younger students, not necessarily the high school students.
And not just for me, but I’ve noticed for many adults in the
church, it’s hard to get respect from a twelve year old, ten
year old, or even an eight year old any more. And it’s really,
really frustrating! It almost makes you have to be a meaner person.
And so, as I’ve become a bit “meaner” towards
those young ones in the church, and taken sort of a “no nonsense”
attitude, the more they realize I mean business, and the less they
try to take advantage of me. At first you try to be guiding with
a bit of discipline if you see them up to something maybe they shouldn’t
be. You understand that since they’re young, and you’re
old, they will respect you and obey with no questions asked. Then,
without expecting it, they say “no” or ask “why”
or say “I don’t have to,” and you find yourself
a bit shocked with the whole situation. Then, when they do give
in to you, you only find that they’ve fooled you in some way,
and pretty much just agreed with you to get you off of their back,
and to leave you alone, at least temporarily.
So why is this happening as our society advances
in nearly every other aspect? Well, it could be a couple of reasons.
Of course, my theories could be wrong, but I think they are logical
at least. For some reason, as our society grows, there is more for
our kids to do and to get involved with, so that creates sort of
a trap for less guidelines than maybe we had as kids. As they learn
all the bounds of their PC’s, PS2’s, and Nintendo’s,
they become comfortable with “doing what they want.”
It’s amazing that kids have two or more of the above listed
equipment in the first place, with almost no resistance from parents.
A lot even have all three. When I was a kid, I had to beg for at
least a year before I was allowed to have a “Sega Base System,”
and that was around or less than $100. Now if a kid wants a computer,
the next day their out looking for a computer, or the new PS2 or
dreamcast, which are both significantly more expensive than any
video game system I ever wanted. Not to mention a computer, depending
on the model, is at least somewhere around $1,000. With these things,
with many parents, there are not many boundaries. Almost endless
time can be spent using any of these (particularly a computer).
The parents are spending less and less time taking their kids to
parks, or to cultural events, and using what little time they’ve
left for their kids in the first place, learning how to play the
games with their kids. With little limits or boundaries from parents,
how in the world are non-parent supervisors supposed to easily contain
what they can or want to do?
I am not generalizing this to everybody, but
these are two things that I believe do happen very much. Not to
mention, I think kids don’t get as much instruction from their
parents on how they are supposed to act when they are not around
their parents. Or specific instruction on where they are supposed
to be, and what they are supposed to be doing if they are in a situation
where the kids are with the parents, but the parents are involved
with something else. I mean, my mom still tells me to be on my best
behavior in certain situations, and don’t give the people
I’m with any trouble or whatever. Ok, so maybe it has been
a couple of years since she has, but man, she never forgot to tell
me multiple times how to act, and how to treat others in any given
situation where my parents would not be present. Pretty annoying
at the time, but now I’m realizing “yeah! Parents don’t
do that as much any more. Way to go mom!”
So parents, if you’re reading this, please
give you kids some boundaries and rules up front rather than waiting
for things to happen then trying to fix it. I see so many kids in
a youth group type setting (not necessarily my own) who are there
because they strive to feel love in a structured sort of way. Who’ve
never had boundaries their whole lives, and whose parents might
not have been involved enough to care about or create them. They
find that in a youth group type setting, with adults there who love
them, and keep them in check. But it shouldn’t start with
the youth group; the youth group should support it after years of
foundation at home.
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